its 12.56 am.
its just another day passed.
but well, i ve to say, today was a much more meaningful day thn any other evn though its still not much. so, why was it much more meaning? its because i nearly died from all the lovey dovey actions from a couple -.- they're wayyyyy toooo sweeeeet. so sweet it kills that is -.- who's the couple? shut up and drive.
but yes, im still god damn fucking way too happy for the both of em. forget the part that i got fooled by a stupid lie, which is quite of nothing seriously, i sort of already expected it whn didi told me theres a big news to be annonced. LOL. darndarn, you two better be that sweet always! darndarndarn, i better wake up my idea and be desperate and go for any girls to beat you two : )
new year was.. usual.
nothing's worth mentioning.
in fact, nothing of the happenings are worth mentioning.
seriously, i wonder if its just me, i think a lot of people, or rather most people, hides a lot of thoughts inside em. i'm not saying i hide nothing, i admit theres so much i hide til sometimes i get the feel of exploding, so yes, those wld be the times i punch my face or something or the same sort. but the main point is, evn best of friends can hide things from each other, i think its really, disappointing. i, myself is included of course, so im not like saying all my friends are at fault while im the perfect guy. i may be the perfect idiot and failure perheps. maybe one day whn evryone spills everything from their heart thn friendship and all wld be so much stronger. okay i need to slap myself, thn everyone wont have privacy so yes, i dunno wht im saying, fuck.
but ill always rmb wht one guy tld me after prom, " only best friends wld tell you the truth, not the sweet lie " nah, of course he didnt put it exactly that way, but he meant something like that.
maybe in the past, i was really that irritating, because i alway demand truth from you. i dont think you'll sees this, even if you do, you prolly wont even its you.
its too late i guess, afterall, its 1.35am :D
往事从提是折磨
and oh, before i go, i have the sudden urge to thank all of my friends.
first up of course, didi, the guy tht is always w me :D
the fools, really, thanks. w/o you guys to kill my time, i'd be dead alrdy.
seriously, i love you guys. much loves.
no, its not the end of course.
but i cant really thank all of em can i -.-
sometimes i get really disappointed by some of my best friends i think i have, partly because its always me taking the initiative to contact em. but, do you guys really only get reminded of me whn you're in some sort of trouble -.- maybe i aint the best friend to you guy i guess, but yeah, ill forget those disappointment because i think you guys are my best friends :D
of course, the part above aint for the fools -.-
sorry.
countless times i said that word to you.
but its probably the only word i can say.
a million things i wanna say.
a million thoughts i want to put into words.
but i cant.
4 years.
so much can happen in that period of time.
i spend one year doubting if i really love you.
one year fearing that ill upset you if i ever told you i love you.
then, it was another year spend being upset w myself because i let go of you.
and the last year, spent it trying to regard you as a friend, hoping only to be beside you whnever you're down and sad, being there to share your joy whn you're happy and to be the joker around you whn you're bored.
the three words i ve never said.
they were prolly never meant to be said.
let all the heartache be gone, just by letting me know you're happy.
and ill know by stepping out of your life, is the best choice i made after 4 years.
